Here I am standing face to face with my fears, insecurities and disappointments. The constant battle within oneself has taken a toll on me, both mentally and psychologically. No one knows it but me, I try to act like I have my life under control but in fact I don’t. I can say personally, that knowing sadness firsthand doesn’t mean I’m immune to it. Despite suffering intense pain I’m always able to stop a while and help someone else that’s struggling. How do I do it, I wish I know; perhaps I numb my pain at that moment and just think about my duty calls.
As a generous individual, it’s so easy to form an emotionally attachment to the pain of the person you’re helping without realizing. The bond share with that person; makes it so easy to understand, share and relate to their struggles. Though I may always try to detach my emotions on several occasions, nonetheless I fail on a few. Those few are able to cause sleepless nights and depression. The moment I realized that I was held hostage to those binding issues, I started laying them out piece by piece. I dissected them individually while applying a little bit of care, which I now see as me building on me.